The first few hours
1/4 Why do I always never know what to do after washing the dishes I used for breakfast? Everyday I would wake up make breakfast and wash the dishes, maybe make my bed and then I slump on the side of the bed and be on my phone for s while just to feel something. Mostly loneliness but something. I have alwasy done this. Every time I finish my morning ritual you can catch me in a slump beside my bed scrolling. And yes you might say, well you're distracting yourself. maybe. But that is the only way I know how to live. It makes me feel something. It make sme sad most of the time but at least its something. Today I woke up with the intentions of being present. I made my breakfast without simultaneously watching anything on my phone like I usually do. I ate my breakfast on the dining table without any distractions and just ate. I looked at the clock and realized that I ate for a short 10 minutes. That was a very quick brefakfast. Maybe because I got so used to wathcing some video and j